Now, one would think the menu choices for prison food would be limited, but there’s an actual cookbook for Orange Is the New Black – and it has recipes for many tasty treats and meals.

Remember, we have a once-successful Russian chef by the name of Red, who runs the kitchen with an iron fist but has a wonderful culinary sensibility. For instance, you could serve her Chicken Kiev or the ratatouille she made for her kitchen staff in Season 3… here’s a recipe:

  • 1 can (28 ounces) whole peeled tomatoes
  • 6 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
  • 1 large eggplant (1 pound), cut into 1-inch pieces
  • Coarse salt and ground pepper
  • 2 large yellow onions (1 pound total), diced large
  • 1 head garlic, cloves smashed and peeled
  • 2 bell peppers (any color), seeded and diced large
  • 2 large zucchini (1 pound total), diced large
  • 1 bay leaf
  • 1 tablespoon fresh marjoram or oregano leaves
  • 2 to 3 tablespoons red-wine vinegar

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place tomatoes and juices on a rimmed baking sheet and use your hands to break tomatoes into 3/4-inch pieces. Drizzle with 2 tablespoons oil and bake until thickened, 30 minutes, stirring every 10 minutes.

Meanwhile, in a colander, toss eggplant with 1 1/2 teaspoons salt. Let sit 20 minutes, then squeeze out excess liquid. In a large Dutch oven or heavy pot, heat 4 tablespoons oil over medium. Add onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until translucent, 5 minutes. Add garlic and cook until onions and garlic are soft, 5 minutes. Add peppers and cook, stirring, until crisp-tender, 4 minutes. Season with salt and pepper.

Add tomatoes, eggplant, zucchini, bay leaf, and marjoram to pot. Cook, stirring occasionally, until mixture comes to a simmer. Reduce heat to medium-low, partially cover, and cook at a gentle simmer until vegetables are tender but not mushy, 15 minutes. Season to taste with vinegar, salt, and pepper. Remove bay leaf before serving.


Or you could make it Taco Night, with taco fixings rice, beans, chips, salsa – and maybe even taco-flavored popcorn. You could also go Southern-style with fried chicken, grits, corn on the cob – and fried dandelions, one of Crazy Eyes’ favorite flowers (see recipe).

As for desserts, mini pies of different flavors might be fun (referencing Crazy Eyes’ famous line “I threw my pie for you”) or flan, if you’re going Taco. You can also simply order orange and chocolate cupcakes and get OITNB toppers.

And to serve, pick up industrial-style plates (with separate compartments) and plastic silverware.

Now, for specialty drinks, the color orange is the key. Like an Orange White Russian, a twist on a classic White Russian (and another nod to Red). You’ll love the citrus touch from a fresh orange and Cointreau. Or how about a Blood Orange Sorbet Gin Float? This sounds yummy.


  • 1 – 1 1/2 oz or your favorite Gin
  • .75 oz of Jack Rudy tonic
  • One scoop of blood orange sorbet (or other flavor)
  • Juice of 1/2 – 1 Meyer lemon
  • One sprig of fresh rosemary
  • Club Soda (to top off drink)

Instructions: To a glass, add one scoop of your favorite sorbet. Add gin and tonic. Top off with soda water. Take rosemary sprig in your hand give it a clap to release some oils. Add rosemary sprig to glass and stir, as sorbet melts.

Decorate the drinks off with all your favorite one-liners from the Litchfield gals as printable straw toppers, and you’ve got yourself a real OITNB party.


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